Title:
Taru Part One
Author: Kyoko_godaikun
Pairing: Shota/Subaru
Note: This is a sequel to "Open Arms"
Summary: Shota and Subaru baby sit Shota's nephew Taru. Because of a car
accident, their lives change forever.
*******
Shota
had always thought of the night his sister Kaori had slept with Subaru as the
incident. It had happened eight years before. It was soon after Shota and
Subaru had become lovers for the first time. Shota could remember how excited
they had been when they had been given permission to live together.
It
helped that Subaru didn't remember the incident. Shota's sister Kaori had spent
the night at their apartment, and the next morning, Shota had found a very hung
over Subaru in his sister's bed. Shota and Kaori decided not to tell Subaru of
the one time he had gotten into the wrong bed, and slept with the wrong Yasuda.
When his sister found out she was pregnant, she decided not to tell Subaru. She
didn't want her baby to be known as the drunk's child. All Subaru knew was that
Shota's sister had become a single mother.
Shota
was close to his little nephew. He would baby sit him for his sister. For some
reason, when Shota was busy, Kaori had always asked Subaru to baby sit Taru.
Shota knew that Subaru really cared for the young boy. Subaru considered
himself Taru's uncle. Shota wondered how Subaru would react if he knew Taru was
more than just an honorary nephew.
"Taru's
going to spend the night, is that all right?" Shota asked Subaru.
"Sure,
why wouldn't it?" his lover asked.
"This
is our first night off together in a long time." Shota reminded him.
"Taru's
family," Subaru reminded him. "It's sometimes good to put your plans
aside for family."
“I’m
going to make some cookies for Taru,” Shota decided, he went into the kitchen.
About
an hour later, the door bell rang. Subaru went and answered it. It was Shota's
sister Kaori and her son Taru. Just by looking at her Subaru knew she was
Shota's sister. There was a strong family resemblance.
"Hi
Uncle Subaru." the seven year old boy said.
"Good
evening Taru-kun." Subaru told him.
"Can
we come in?" Kaori asked.
"Of
course, come in." Subaru opened the door enough to let them in.
"Thanks
for doing this for me." Kaori told Subaru.
"It's
nothing," Subaru smiled at her. "I've always liked caring for
Taru-chan."
"Who’s
at the door?" Shota came into the living room. He was wearing his apron.
He had been busy in the kitchen making cookies for Taru.
"It's
us Uncle Shota!" Taru told him.
"I
hope I'm not imposing on you again," Kaori told her brother. "I
didn't realize I had to work tonight."
"We
always like Taru's visits." Shota told her.
Kaori
looked at her watch. "I've got to go. I'll see you in the morning."
"By
mama!" Taru said.
"Love
you Taru-chan." Kaori hugged her son. "When you wake up in the
morning, I'll be back."
******************
Subaru
found Taru sitting at the table in the living room. He had his art supplies
spread out around the table. Taru was so much like Shota in his love of art. He
would spend all of his time drawing if he had the chance.
Subaru
had always felt drawn to the little boy. Perhaps it was because he reminded him
so much of his little brother. Taru was also so much like Shota. Because he was
Shota's nephew, Subaru thought of him as family. Though Shota hadn't told his
parents about their relationship.
"How
do you like first grade?" Subaru asked him.
"It
isn't fun." The boy looked down to his coloring. His dark hair spilling
into his eyes. "I wish I could be back in kindergarten. All my friends
were there."
"I
didn't like first grade," Subaru confessed.
"You
didn't?" he looked at Subaru.
"There
was a really bossy boy and his friend who was really dumb." Subaru told
him. "I'm shy; I didn't like to talk much. So they used to pick on
me."
"How
did you get them to stop picking on you?" Taru asked quietly. The boy had
once told Subaru that he was picked on at school. Subaru had been working with
him to get it to stop.
"I
really shouldn't tell you that."
"Did
you so something bad?" the boy guessed. "My mama says you used to do
bad things."
"It
wasn't that bad," Subaru admitted. "Don't tell anyone, but the way I
got them to stop was that I hit the bossy one in the face with a block. I kind
of broke his nose."
"Why
can't I tell anyone?" Taru’s dark eyes were curious.
"Because
Uncle Hina still doesn't admit that we knew each other in first grade."
Subaru confessed.
Shota
came out of the kitchen holding a plate of cookies. He set them down on the
table. "What are you boys talking about?"
"Uncle
Babu told me that he broke Uncle Hina's nose once." Taru said helpfully.
"And
when did Uncle Babu do that?" Shota sounded puzzled.
"In
first grade!" The child smiled, he picked up a cookie and took a large
bite out of it.
"You
knew Hina in first grade?" Shota asked.
"Yeah,
I did." Subaru grabbed a cookie.
********************
Shota
had joined Subaru and Taru at the table. They all worked on art, though Subaru
didn't have much talent. His lover understood Shota's needs to be creative, and
that was the important thing.
Shota's
cell phone began to ring. He answered it.
"This
is Yasuda Shota," Shota said.
"Yasuda
san, your sister has been in a car wreck." The voice told him.
"Is
she all right?" Shota asked concerned.
"She
was seriously hurt."
"What
hospital is she in?"
"St
Mari's. It was the closest to the wreck." The caller told him.
"I
see, thank you for calling." Shota hung up.
Shota
was concerned. He wanted to run out of the apartment and to the hospital. He
wanted to make sure his sister was all right. She had to be all right, there
was no one else to care for Taru. But she had been hurt and the not knowing if
she was all right was worse than knowing the truth.
"What's
wrong Uncle Shota?" Taru asked.
"Your
mama's been in a car wreck." Shota told him.
"Is
she all right?" the boy asked concerned.
"I
don't know yet." Shota confessed.
"Go
to her." Subaru encouraged. "Kaori needs you right now."
"What
about Taru?" Shota asked. "I promised we'd take care of him."
"Don't
worry about that," Subaru told his lover. "I'll take care of him. You
need to be with your sister."
"But..."
Subaru
got up, he went to Shota. He reached out touching his cheek. "You're part
of my family."
"We're
not related." Shota reminded him.
"Kanjani
8 has gone through so much that I think of all of you as family." Subaru
caressed his check with his thumb. "You're a very special member of my
family. Please my love. Go to Kaori. I'll take care of Taru for you."
"Thank
you," Shota was again reminded just how much Subaru loved him. "I
love you."
"I
love you too." Subaru smiled sadly at him. "Now go."
*******************
Shota
couldn't see Kaori. She was in surgery. He was the one that had to call his
parents. Since they lived in Hyogo, it would be a while for them to get to the
hospital.
Shota
invited his parents to stay at his apartment while they visited. He was so
concerned for his sister, that he didn't worry about the fact that he had
hidden his relationship with Subaru from them. He knew his father wouldn't
understand. His father had never accepted that he was gay. He had always
thought of it as a stage.
Soon,
Hina and Ohkura arrived at the hospital.
"Why
are you here?" Shota asked.
"Baru
called me," Hina explained. "He didn't want you to be alone."
"Have
you heard anything yet?" Ohkura asked.
"Kaori's
still in surgery." Shota explained. "She's been hurt badly. They say
she might not make it."
Hina
sat down at one side of Shota, Ohkura the other.
"Subaru
called all of us." Ohkura told him. "If we have to take it in shifts,
we'll make sure you won't have to be alone."
Shota
felt tears sting his eyes. Subaru had always called the group his family. Now
Shota realized that it was true, in a strange way Kanjani 8 was a family.
********************
******
Shota's
parents arrived in town. Subaru had to pretend. He lied and said that the guest
bedroom was his room. He couldn't tell Shota his feelings. He knew he had to,
to protect Shota from his father. Subaru was one of the few people that knew
that Yasuda San used to beat Shota when he was a child.
Shota's
parents had gotten divorced when Shota was only six. Unlike most divorced
couples on Japan, they had an almost friendly relationship. Shota had stayed in
contact with his father. When the accident happened, his mother had invited his
father to stay with Shota.
Subaru
had laid down some rules that no matter what his father told Subaru, he
couldn't fight back. Shota explained that his father was a bigot and that he
enjoyed fighting for fighting sake. Subaru hated to agree. He didn't like
bullies, but he tried to go along with Shota's wishes.
Shota
and his family were so busy with the hospital that Subaru concentrated on doing
both Shota's work and his work. That was the only way Shota was allowed off
work, if someone else did his filming.
The
group rallied around taking care of Taru. It was Maru's turn to have Taru spend
the night. Kanjani 8 had made it sound like an adventure. The family didn't
want him to go to the hospital to see his mother. After a week Kaori was still
in intensive care. Her condition never bettered.
Subaru
gave up 'his' bedroom to Shota's father. He slept on the floor on a futon.
Shota gave up their bedroom to his mother Mesuji san. Shota's step father
couldn't get off work, so he was back at home.
Shota
slept on one side of the room, Subaru on the other. They couldn't let Shota's
father know the truth. That Shota was gay, and living with a lover.
Subaru
laid in his futon. He tried not to think of his lover just a few meters away
from him. They had been back together for six months, but Subaru still felt as
if he was in the honeymoon phase. Knowing his lover was so close to he was very
difficult for Subaru to sleep. Subaru closed his eyes, trying to think of
anything besides the way Shota felt when he held him.
"Babu,"
he heard Shota whisper.
"Yes?"
Subaru whispered back.
"I
can't sleep," Shota confessed.
"Neither
can I," Subaru admitted.
Shota
got up and went to Subaru's futon. "Can I sleep with you tonight?"
"We'll
get caught," Subaru warned. "You told me that your father's an early
riser."
"I'll
get up before my father does." Shota promised. "Please Babu; it’s
been a week since we’ve been together...”
"All
right," Subaru moved over and Shota got into the futon beside him.
Shota's
lips found his. Subaru kissed back. He couldn't help it. He loved Shota so
much. He didn't realize how much trouble he was getting as he made love to
Shota.
****************
Subaru
could hear someone walking around the room. It wasn't the dogs, it was a human
man. The steps angry, hostile. He could feel Shota sleeping against him. Subaru
got a sinking feeling in his stomach. They had been caught.
The
lights suddenly came on.
"Get
the hell away from my son!" Yasuda san ordered.
Subaru
sat up; he looked around for his clothes. He quickly pulled them on. Then he
covered up his lover's nude body.
"This
isn't how it looks." Subaru told him.
"What?
You didn't crawl into his futon and forced him to have sex with you?" the
older man demanded.
"Nothing
I do with Shota is forced." Subaru admitted. "You did know your son
is gay?"
Subaru
went into the kitchen, hoping that Shota's father would leave him alone. He had
promised Shota that he wouldn't fight with Yasuda san.
Instead,
Yasuda San followed him into the kitchen. The punch came out of nowhere, Yasuda
San's fist connecting with Subaru's eye.
"What
do you want from me?" Subaru gasped. He wanted to fight back, but he had
made a promise to Shota.
"I
want you to leave him alone." Shota's father ordered. "I want you to
find your own apartment, and live somewhere else."
"This
is my apartment," Subaru pointed out. "He moved in with me."
"Are
you the one that made him this way?" he demanded punching Subaru in the
nose. He could hear a crack, and then Subaru's nose began to bleed heavily. ..
"I
don't know what you mean."
"Of
course you know what I mean!" Yasuda san thundered. "Are you the one
that seduced him and forced him to love men?"
"Why
don't you ask your son those questions?" Subaru demanded.
"Don't
deny you're gay!" The man hit Subaru over and over again.
**********************
Shota
couldn't help but hear what his father did to Subaru. Shota was terrified of
his father, but he couldn't let his lover be hurt. Shota quickly got dressed.
Shota
ran into the kitchen. "Leave him alone!"
Subaru
looked at him; his left eye was almost swollen shut. His nose was bleeding.
Shota realized that even though he was attacked, Subaru had kept his promise.
He hadn't fought back.
"I'm
trying to protect you from perverts like him!" Yasuda san insisted.
"Babu
run! Get away from here!" Shota ordered.
Subaru
nodded and ran out of the kitchen. Shota could hear the front door open and
close. That meant that Shota was alone with his father.
"You
had no right to attack my lover!" Shota tried to keep his voice level.
"I
needed to know if he's the one that turned you homosexual." Yasuda san
sneered.
"No
one turned me homosexual. I was born gay." Shota admitted. "You can't
blame him for my being gay. Shibutani kun wasn't my first male lover!"
"Then
who was it that made you this way?"
"I
told you! No one made me this way!" Shota insisted. "I found someone
who makes me happy! Why can't you accept it?"
"After
what Shibutani did to your sister, how can you stand to be around him?" he
thundered. "He left her alone and pregnant."
"Subaru
had no idea she was expecting."
"He
couldn't guess?" Yasuda san sounded like he couldn't believe his ears.
"That man destroyed one of my child's lives; I don't want him to destroy
the other!"
"You
are no longer welcome in my house." Shota told him.
"You
can't throw me out!" Yasuda san shoved Shota hard.
"I
mean it father, take your things and leave my apartment!" Shota shoved him
back. "No one treats my lover the way you did."
Shota's
father hit Shota hard across the face. So it had begun, as it had countless times
in the past. Yasuda San would beat his son.
"Shunta!
Stop it!" Shota's mother ordered as she came into the kitchen.
"He's
taking the side of that Shibutani against me!" Shota's father hit him
again.
Shota
had enough; he was no longer the scared young child who would let himself be
beaten. Using all his strength he punched his father as hard as he could. Shota
could hear a loud popping sound. His father fell to the ground. Blood spurted
from his father's nose.
"Damn
it Shota! I think you broke my nose!" his father gasped.
"I
mean it father, take your things and go to a hotel!" Shota ordered.
I'm
going nowhere!" Yasuda san spat.
"Please
mother, can you get father to leave?" Shota asked. "After what he did
to Subaru, I no longer want him here."
"Of
course," Mesuji told him gently. "Now go find your lover."
*****************
Subaru
did as Shota told him. He ran. His nose hadn't' stopped bleeding. His left eye
had swollen to the point that Subaru couldn’t' see out of it. His whole face
hurt.
He
went to Hina's apartment; he put his finger on the doorbell, not letting off
until someone answered the door. It was Ohkura.
"Subaru!
What happened?" the drummer asked.
"Help
me, please." Subaru gasped.
"Sure,
come in." Ohkura moved so that Subaru could come into the apartment.
Subaru
went to the couch and sat down. Ohkura went and got a towel. He handed it to
Subaru, who pressed it against his nose.
"Thank
you," Subaru said.
"Who
did this to you?" Ohkura asked concerned.
"Shota's
father." Subaru admitted. "He caught Shota in bed with me."
"He
didn't know that Yassan's gay?" Ohkura asked.
"I
think he's in denial." Subaru told him. "He didn't believe me when I
told him I wasn't Shota's first boy friend."
"He
wants to know who Yassan's first boy friend was." Ohkura repeated. He got
a strange look on his face.
"If
you know, don't tell anyone." Subaru moved the soaked towel and pressed a
cleaner part against his face. "I think his father would kill him for
seducing Shota."
"Oh
I see." Ohkura went into the kitchen and got a bag of ice for Subaru.
"Think we should call the doctor for your nose?"
"No,
there would be too many questions asked." Subaru told him.
Ohkura
went into the other room. Subaru could hear him talking to Hina.
Hina
came into the living room, and took one look at him. "You're going to the
doctor."
"I
don't want to go." Subaru protested.
"Let
me see your nose," Hina demanded. Subaru moved the blood soaked towel for
a moment. "You're right Tacchon, it's broken."
Hina
pulled out his cell phone and called the agency. He explained quickly what
happened.
They
were about to go when the door rang. Ohkura answered it.
"What
are you doing here?" Ohkura demanded.
"Is
Baru-Chan here?" Shota asked.
"Let
him in," Subaru told the drummer.
Shota
came into the living room. His right eye was swollen shut, his top lip was
swollen. "Baru Chan, are you all right?"
"Oh
my god. He beat you too." Subaru realized.
"I'm
all right." Shota joined him on the couch. He took Subaru's hand.
"I'm in big trouble. I think I broke his nose."
"You
broke your father's nose?" Ohkura asked.
"Yeah,
I think I did." Shota admitted.
"I'm
taking you both to the doctor." Hina decided. "Your eye looks very
bad Yassan; it really needs to be looked at."
**************************
****************************
Shota
sat on a seat in the doctor's waiting room. He had been checked by the doctor
first. He found out that he looked worse than he was. He just had a badly
bruised eye. His mother had called him earlier, to tell him that his father had
a broken nose. She also told him that he had disowned Shota. In a way he was
glad that his father was no longer in his life.
Shota
had had never introduced the group to his father. It was because he was ashamed
how bigoted his father was. His father had never accepted Shota's sexuality,
though he had come out to him several times. Yasuda-san had always insisted
that Shota’s sexuality was a phase. He had always been in denial about it,
believing if his son found the right girl that he would stop liking men.
If
only Subaru was all right. Shota could still remember Subaru’s face bleeding,
his eye almost swollen shut. Shota had never felt so guilty about anything in
his life. His father had badly injured Subaru. His lover didn't deserve to be
hurt. He was worried; would his father's actions drive Subaru away from him?
The
wait for Subaru to see the doctor was taking much longer than it did for Shota
to see the doctor. The doctor was giving him a CAT scan to make sure that the
brake wasn't too serious.
Shota
reached up and touched his eye patch. He would have to keep his black eye
covered until the swelling had gone down. He knew that the agency would be
upset that one of its idols had its face bruised.
Ohkura
sat beside him. "Are you worrying about Sibu-kun?"
"Yeah,
I hope he isn't hurt too badly." Shota confessed. "I shouldn't have
made him promise not to fight my father."
"You
can't help that now." Ohkura rubbed Shota's back. It was so familiar, so
comforting to Shota. "Sibu-Chan told me something, something that bothers
me."
"What's
that?"
"If
your father finds out who your first lover was, he’ll kill him." Ohkura
almost whispered.
"My
father isn't going to find out." Shota said firmly.
"How
can we guarantee that?"
"Ta-Chan,
I haven't even told Babu." Shota looked at his friend. "Why would I
tell my father?"
"I
just thought..."
"Well,
don't." Shota insisted. “No one will ever find out.”
"You
know, there's a part of me that still loves you." Ohkura admitted.
"Sometimes I look back to those times, and I can't believe I was so
happy."
"You
have Hina now." Shota reminded him.
"Shingo's
so wonderful. I want to spend my life with him." the drummer said.
"But..."
"I'm
glad my first time was with you." Shota took his hand and squeezed it.
"You'll always hold a special place in my heart."
Hina
came out of the doctor’s office, closely followed by Subaru. His friend had an
eye patch on his left eye. His nose was also splinted.
When
Ohkura saw Hina, he quickly let go of Shota's hand. His whole demeanor changed
when he saw Hina. He gave his lover a look that he had never given Shota. The
guitar player could tell just how deeply Ohkura loved Hina with that one look.
"How
is he?" Shota got to his feet.
"I'm
off work for three weeks." Subaru grumbled. "I might not even be
allowed to go back then."
"What
did my father do to you?" Shota asked.
"Broken
cheek and nose, and he broke his orbital bone." Hina explained.
"What’s
an orbital bone?" Ohkura repeated.
"The
part of my face here," Subaru touched a place near his eyebrow.
Shota
suddenly felt very, very guilty. Tears stung his eyes. "I'm so sorry
Babu."
"I
guess we better take you home." Hina decided.
Subaru
suddenly looked very, very afraid. "Yasuda-san still there?"
"My
mother told me my father returned home." Shota explained. "He's no
longer welcome in my house, not after he hurt you."
**********************
The
guilt Shota felt was overwhelming. He didn't sit by Subaru in the taxi that
took him back to the apartment he shared with Subaru. Instead he sat by Ohkura.
He couldn't stand to see Subaru, with the bruises on his face. The splint on
his nose. The large eye patch that covered his hurt eye. His lover was injured
because of him.
Shota
realized it had to end. He would have to give Subaru his freedom, though he
didn't want to. He had to protect his lover from his family.
Ohkura
and Hina went with him to their apartment. Their dogs greeted them. Shota bent
down and pet them. How would he ever be able to separate the dogs?
"Shota-Chan,
you're back," His mother came into the entry way. She touched Shota's
bruised face; her hand flickered over the eye patch he had to wear. "I
can't believe your father did this to you."
"He
used to beat me as a child. Why do you think anything changed?" Shota
pointed out.
“I’m
really sorry,” Mesuji san told him.
“It’s
not your fault,” Shota walked past his mother. “I’ve never blamed you for what
father did to me.”
Ohkura
came into the apartment followed by Hina. "Is Yasuda-san still here?"
"No,
he’s gone back to his home." Mesuji san told him.
"Subaru-kun,
it's safe." Hina called into the hallway.
Subaru
entered the apartment. Shota's mother gasped when she saw him. Subaru swayed a
bit.
"Shibutani
Kun, are you all right?" Mesuji san asked.
"I
think I need to sit down." Subaru admitted. Hina friend helped him to the
couch, where Subaru sat down.
"Have
you taken your pain meds yet?" Hina asked.
"I
can't take them." Subaru confessed.
"Why
can't you?" Shota's mother asked.
"I'm
an addict. I'm afraid if I take the pills, I'll go back to drinking."
Subaru confessed.
"Would
you like some tea? It might make you feel better," Shota's mother
suggested.
"That
would be really nice." Subaru agreed. "Can you make some for all of
us?"
"I
think that can be arranged." Shota's mother looked at him. "Shota,
come help."
"Of
course, mother." Shota bowed to his friends and went into the kitchen.
*************************
After
several hours, Subaru was finally alone with Shota. Hina and Ohkura had
returned to their apartment. Shota's mother had gone to the hospital. Taru was
spending the night with Yoko.
Subaru's
body was craving beer. But for the first time he wasn’t craving beer because of
stress; he was craving it because he needed something to take away the pain of
his injured face. He couldn't believe his face could hurt as much as it did.
Hangovers were bad, but what he felt with his face was even worse. He had been
given pain pills, but he was afraid to take them. He was terrified that if he
took the pills that it would cause him to go back to drinking.
Subaru
couldn't understand why Shota was acting so strange around him. His lover
wouldn't look him in the eyes. Instead, he looked almost like a hunted animal,
his eyes darting everywhere.
Subaru
sat on the couch, but Shota sat on the only chair in the living room. Subaru
waited for Shota to say something. His lover had a way of making things
brighter when Subaru felt bad. This time though, Shota stayed strangely silent.
"What
did I do wrong?" Subaru asked.
"You
didn't do anything." Shota looked like he was interested in an invisible
spot on the carpet.
"You
won't look at me." Subaru pointed out. "I must have done something
horrible to you to make you this angry."
“I’m
not angry with you.” Shota admitted. "I'm sorry for what my father did to
you."
"It's
not your fault." Subaru told him.
"I
don't know why my father gets this way." Shota tried to explain. "He
wants me to be like everyone else, to get married, and to have a family."
"I
guess it wouldn't help if I told him I wanted to marry you." Subaru
confessed.
Shota
suddenly looked up to him. His eye bandaged the same way Subaru's eye was.
"You what?"
"Never
mind," Subaru kicked himself. He couldn't believe he had just confessed
his innermost desire to Shota.
"Please
Babu-Chan; I need you to say those words to me." Shota told him in almost
a whisper. "It would make what we went through worthwhile."
"I
said I want to marry you." the older man looked into his eyes. "I
love you, and I want to spend my life with you. I want to have a family with
you." Subaru looked away from him. "But we can't get married. We
can't have a family together. I'm sorry I brought it up."
"I
want the same thing too." Shota confessed as he moved to the couch.
"I want to marry you, to have a family with you."
"Does
that mean we're engaged?" Subaru guessed.
"I
guess it does." Shota told him. "The day we're legally allowed to get
married will be our wedding day."
"That's
one of the reasons I love you so much, you're so hopeful." Subaru took
Shota's hand. "Sho-chan, does your whole family think that I'm a bad
influence on you?"
"My
mom adores you." Shota squeezed his hand. "She's proud of the way you
turned yourself around."
"I
hope so." he brought Shota's hand to his lips and kissed the knuckles.
"I don't care what your father says, I'm not leaving you."
"Good,
because I won't let you." Shota kissed him very, very gently.
Subaru
flinched when Shota accidently touched his nose. Shota pulled away from him.
“I’m
sorry. My face really hurts.” Subaru explained.
“You
need to take the medicine the doctor gave you.” Shota told him.
“We
both know I can’t take the medicine. If I do, I’ll go back to drinking. That’s
the problem of being an addict. I can’t take pain medication.” Subaru reached
out touching Shota. “Just your being here makes me feel better.”
“I’ll
always be here,” Shota promised. Subaru realized that Shota was right; he would
always be with him.
*****************
*******************
It
was late when Shota returned home from the hospital. He found Subaru sitting on
the couch, watching TV. It had been four days since Subaru had been attacked by
Shota's father.
Subaru
had decided that since he didn't have work, he would take care of Taru for
Shota. The child was asleep on the other end of the couch.
"Are
you still awake?" Shota asked.
"I
wanted to see the end of the movie." Subaru rubbed his good eye. He sat up
and stretched. "I guess I better put Taru to bed."
"Why
don't you let me do that?" Shota asked.
"I
promised I would take care of him." Subaru reminded him.
"What's
wrong with a little break?" Shota smiled. He didn't tell Subaru how
worried he was about him. Subaru had gone four days without sleep.
Shota
picked up the sleeping boy. He carried Taru to his bedroom. Subaru ran ahead to
open the door. Then he moved the blankets so that Shota could lay him down.
Subaru
was the one that pulled the blankets up to Taru's neck. Then he tucked him in.
His hand reached out to touch Taru's hair.
"Is
something wrong?" Shota asked.
"I
was just thinking...if we had a son, I wonder if he would look like Taru
chan." Subaru said softly. “He looks like a strange combination of you and
me.”
"You’re
right, he does." Shota felt torn. He wanted to tell his lover the truth,
that Taru was his son. But Shota had made a promise, and he was the type to
always keep his promises.
"It's
strange how he resembles me." Subaru paused. "I need to stop
dreaming."
"Dreaming?"
Shota repeated.
"I
want us to have a family, to have children. We could have a little girl that
looks like you, and a little boy that looks like me." Subaru sighed.
"I know we'll never have biological children. If we are lucky enough to
have a family. We’ll have to adopt."
"Someday,
we'll have a family." Shota promised. “Even if they are adopted, I’ll love
them.”
"Johnny-sama
will never allow that." Subaru paused. "We’re going to wake Taru. Why
don’t we go to the living room?"
"Yeah,
okay." Shota agreed.
They
went back into the living room. Subaru swayed a bit. Then he almost fell onto
the couch.
"Be
careful," Shota said as he sat down beside Subaru.
"I'm
just a little tired." his lover admitted.
"Why
don't you get some sleep?" Shota asked concerned.
"I
can't. When I sit up I can handle the pain." Subaru said softly.
"When I lay down, my face throbs so much that I can't sleep."
"Have
you tried sleeping on the recliner?" Shota asked. "You could put the
legs up, and you might be comfortable."
"Why
do you think that?" his lover asked suspiciously.
"I
always sleep on the recliner when I have a cold. When I'm all stuffed up, I
can't sleep lying down." Shota explained.
'I'm
so tired I'm willing to try anything." Subaru admitted.
Shota
got some blankets and a pillow. Subaru sat down on the recliner. Shota moved
the legs so that they were up. Then he put a pillow behind Subaru's head. He
then covered up his lover.
"How
does that feel?" Shota smiled.
"Really
good." Subaru admitted.
"Good
night Babu-Chan," Shota told him. "Love you."
"I
love you too." Subaru closed his eyes.
Shota
dimmed the lights and went into the kitchen. He made himself a cup of tea. A
few minutes later Shota went back into the living room. His lover was snoring.
Finally Subaru was asleep. Shota curled up on the couch and sipped his tea. All
he could think of was Subaru's wish to have a family. It wasn't a bad wish.
Shota decided to talk to Kaori when she got out of the hospital. Perhaps he
would be able to talk her into believing just how wonderful of a father Subaru
could be.
Kaori,
Shota said a prayer for her. His sister was still in a coma. Her condition had
never improved. Hopefully everything would be all right. Then Taru would have
his mother back.
********
Shota
was spending the day at the hospital. His sister had taken a turn for the
worst, and his family decided that someone needed to be there at all times.
That left Subaru with Shota's mother and Taru.
As
soon as Taru had come home from school he took out his art supplies. Then he
sat at the living room table, and began to draw a picture of Subaru’s' dogs.
Taru was crazy about the dogs. He spent many happy hours on the floor playing
with them.
"Uncle
Subaru, what was the accident like?" Taru asked him.
"The
accident?" Subaru repeated.
"Grandmother
told me that you and Uncle Shota got in an accident. That's why you're
hurt." Taru explained.
"To
tell the truth, I can barely remember it." Subaru told him.
"You
have to be careful next time." Taru told him. "If you're not, you might
be in the hospital like my mama."
"Do
you want to see your mama?"
"I
miss her, but Taru's too young to go to hospital." He looked down to his
picture.
Subaru
came up with an idea. He would do something to get Taru's mind off of his
mother. He went into the kitchen. Shota's mother was fixing dinner. Unlike
Yasuda San, Mesuji San had accepted her son's sexuality.
"Can
I take Taru to the park?" Subaru asked Shota's mother.
“Isn’t
it a bit late to take him to the park?" Mesuji pointed out.
"Taru's
upset about his mama. I thought going to the park might take his mind off of
it." Subaru explained. "There's a park right up the street. Shota and
I walk our dogs there every day."
Shota's
mother thought for a moment. "That might be a good idea. Be back by dinner
time."
"I
will," Subaru promised.
*******
Subaru
took Taru to the park. They took the dogs with them. Taru carried the leashes
of the two youngest dogs Java and Siva.
"When
mama gets out of the hospital, I want puppies." Taru told Subaru. "I
want them to be sisters, like Java and Siva."
"Hopefully,
your mother will get you puppies." Subaru told him. "If she doesn’t,
you can always share our dogs."
"I
can share them really?" Taru's dark eyes were so innocent.
"From
now on, they are your dogs too." Subaru decided.
For
the first time since his mother's accident, Taru smiled at Subaru.
They
finally arrived at the dog area. Subaru sat down on a bench while the child ran
off to play with the dogs.
Subaru
was glad that hardly anyone was at the park. People stared at him. But he
understood why. He put his dark glasses on. Then he pulled his hood on.
"How
old is your son?" A woman asked him.
"You
mean my nephew?" Subaru corrected. "He's seven."
"He’s
really cute." She told him. "His father must be proud to have a son
like him."
"He
must," Subaru lied. He didn't want to mention that Taru didn't have a
father. He did know it was strange just how much Taru looked like Subaru's
younger brother.
Subaru
reached for his phone, he wanted to take a photo of Taru, but realized that he
had left it at the apartment.
"So
this is where you went." The unmistakable voice of Hina said.
"Taru
was getting really upset about his mother, so I brought him here." Subaru
explained.
"That
was a good idea." Hina looked around. “We have to talk.”
Subaru
realized something serious had happened. "What's wrong?"
"We
tried to call you, but we couldn’t get any answer." Hina told him.
"Shota's not in any condition to come here. So I said I would give you the
news."
"Did
something happen?"
"Kaori
went into cardiac arrest." Hina explained. "The doctor's weren't able
to revive her."
"She's
dead." Subaru realized. “Shota needs me to be with him. The only problem
is that I have my dogs and Taru with me.”
"I'll
take care of the dogs and Taru." Hina decided. "You have to go to the
hospital right now."
**************
Shota
couldn't stop crying. His big sister was gone. He had been there when she had
gone into cardiac arrest. His mother had arrived soon after he had called her.
She had gone to the chapel to talk to the priest. So Shota was left alone in
the waiting room.
"Shota
Chan," the very familiar voice of his lover said.
"Subaru,
Kaori's gone." Shota began to cry again.
Subaru
went to him, holding him close. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."
Subaru
held Shota as he sobbed. He stroked his hair, whispering that it would be all
right. Shota wasn't sure how it would be all right. Kaori was Shota's best
friend outside of the agency.
Soon
Maru, Yoko and Ryo arrived. The group huddled together, supporting each other.
"Where
are Hina and Tacchon?" Yoko asked.
"Their
taking care of Taru," Subaru explained.
"The
poor little boy," Maru began to sob almost uncontrollably.
"Ryu-chan,
it will be all right," Ryo took his lover in his arms.
"We're
here for you," Yoko promised. "Don't worry about work or Taru; we'll
take care of him."
"I'm
so lucky to have a group as wonderful as you." Shota told them.
"We're
not just a group, we're a family." Yoko reminded him. "Your family
will always be with you."
****************************
*******************
Shota
had to return to the family home for his sister Kaori’s funeral. His mother had
quickly decided that Taru was too young for the funeral. Besides, he would miss
too much school. The decision had angered Subaru. He thought that Taru really
needed his family.
Instead,
Subaru had been nominated to be the baby sitter. He was perfect for the job; he
was on a forced vacation. Shota's father had refused to let Subaru attend the
funeral. So he really had nothing else to do.
Subaru
hadn't really spent much time alone with Taru. Shota always seemed to be there.
Taru
sat on the floor playing with Java and Siva. Those were his two favorite dogs.
They still behaved like puppies.
"Uncle
Baru?' Taru asked.
"Yes
Taru-Chan?" Subaru said.
"If
Leelia died, would Java and Siva miss their mama?"
"Of
course they would." Subaru got onto the floor with Taru. "Do you miss
you mama?"
Taru
nodded, tears stared running down his cheeks. "Why did she have to go
away?"
"I
don't know."
"Now
I'm alone." he said morosely.
"No
you're not." Subaru reached out and touched the boy’s tears. "You
have Uncle Shota and me. And of course you have the dogs."
"I
wish you were my papa." The boy told him. "I think you would be a
good papa."
"I
wish you were my son," Subaru confessed. "Sometimes I look at you and
think you're my son."
"I
always ask Santa to bring my papa to me." The boy confessed. "How can
my papa not want me?"
"I
don't know," Subaru admitted. "I hope my son will be as wonderful as
you."
*************
Subaru
hadn't spent much time in his bedroom, only going in there to change his
clothes. He spent most of his time in the living room. He went into the
bedroom, for the first time he realized there was an envelope on the bedside
table. It was addressed to Shota, from Kaori. There was a handwritten note on
the envelope.
Subaru,
You
really need to read this. If you do, do not tell Taru what you read. I mean it
Subaru. We have to agree with Kaori's wishes.
Love
Shota
Subaru
knew he was being noisy, but he opened it.
"Shota,
I
really don't believe that Subaru is sober. I don't believe he's changed. I will
never forgive him for what he did to me.
He
seduced me into believing for one night that he loved me. Do you really think
telling me that he doesn't remember can take my pain away? He cried your name
when we loved, did you know that? He wasn't even thinking of me, he was
thinking of you. Do you know how much that hurts?
The
only good thing I got from that night was Taru. I hate that Taru looks like
him. If my son looked like you, I could forget. Instead every time I look at my
son I see your lover.
Now
you want me to tell Subaru? I can't believe that you want your lover to know
that he’s the father of my child. Letting Taru think he's his uncle is almost
too much. If you tell Subaru that he is a father, you will never see Taru
again.
No
matter what happens Taru will never find out that your so called boy friend is
his father!
Your
sister,
Kaori
"Uncle
Baru, what's wrong?" Taru asked.
Subaru
looked up to the boy. He put the letter in his pocket. "It's
nothing."
*******************
Subaru
wanted to call Shota, to demand his lover tell him what exactly was going on.
How could Shota know he was Taru's father and not tell him? Subaru really
thought his lover trusted him. Now that he knew that Shota had kept a secret
from him, he was no longer sure.
Subaru
had never felt so confused about anything in his life. He was a father; he
finally had the child he always wanted. The only problem was that his child
would never know he was his father. Though when he looked at Taru, he felt as
if he was looking into a mirror.
Subaru
fell asleep on the chair, it was the only place he could sleep with his
injuries. He was woken by someone shaking him.
"Uncle
Baru," the young voice of Taru said. "Are you awake?"
"What's
wrong Taru-Chan?" Subaru asked concerned.
"I'm
afraid. Can I sleep with you?"
"I'm
sleeping on the chair," He pointed out.
"Please,
there are ghosts." The boy said terrified. "I can hear them through
the wall talking. They're going to get me!"
"I
think you're hearing the neighbors." Subaru told him gently.
"Please
Uncle Baru; don't make me go back in there." Taru begged,
Subaru
realized this was the first thing as a father he could do for his son. He moved
over a bit. "Come on Taru, there's room for you."
Taru
climbed onto his lap. Subaru held him, as he did he stroked Taru's hair. Soon
the boy was asleep.
*************
It
was hard to be away from Shota so long, but it gave Subaru time to get to know
Taru. The closer Subaru got to Taru, the more he realized that the boy was his
son. It was a gut feeling that grew stronger every moment Subaru spent with
Shota. Subaru couldn't remember sleeping with Kaori, but there were many people
he had slept with that he didn't remember.
The
only thing he regretted is that he had seduced Kaori into being with him. There
would always be a part of him that would feel guilty for what he did to Kaori.
It
was Subaru's job to pick up Taru from school. He wanted to go to the school, to
tell the teachers that he was there to pick up his son. Instead, he told them
the usual story, he was there to pick up his nephew. Besides, Taru didn't have
Subaru's name. The boy was Yasuda Taru, not Shibutani Taru. Subaru didn't want
unnecessary questions being asked about Taru.
Taru
went to a Catholic school. Though Shota and Subaru hadn't talked much about
religion, Shota's family was Catholic. Subaru didn't think it would be good
idea to tell the nuns that Subaru felt more pagan then anything. That he felt
strange that his son was attending a Catholic school. . Besides, as 'uncle'
Subaru didn't have much say in the matter.
While
Subaru waited for Taru, he looked around the lobby. The school had a Christmas
tree, and a display. There was a notice on a board stating there would be a
Christmas program in a few days. There was a list of soloists on the notice,
one of them being Yasuda Taru.
"Uncle
Baru, are you ready?" the young voice asked.
"I
see you're going to be in a program." Subaru gestured.
"Yes,
it's a concert. Just like you and Uncle Shota." the boy said proudly. "Will
you come to my concert?"
"Of
course I will," Subaru promised.
"Uncle
Babu, you look like me!" Taru smiled at him. "Sister Rita said so
this morning."
"Well,
I am your uncle." Subaru pointed out.
"I
wish you were my papa." Taru took Subaru's hand.
Subaru
smiled at the child, though inside he wished he could hear his son call him
Papa.
***************
"Christmas
is coming today," Taru sang to himself as he rode in the car. He had been
singing Christmas songs almost since they had gotten into the car. Subaru
thought it was strange, the holiday was two weeks away. But then he realized
that Taru was simply practicing for the play.
While
they were driving, Subaru looked at the boy. "Do you like Christmas?"
"Yes,
Uncle Baru." the boy said brightly. "Mama always had a tree, and we
ate fried chicken every Christmas day. Santa always leaves me as many presents as
I am old."
"That
sounds like a good memory." Subaru smiled.
"Santa
won't find me this year." He said sadly. "Mama's gone, and Santa
won't know where I am staying."
"Perhaps
if we get a tree, he might know." Subaru suggested.
"I
would really like that Uncle Baru." Taru smiled.
**************
Subaru
took Taru to their apartment. He went to his closet and got out the boxes
marked "Christmas things'. Shota's favorite holiday was Christmas. He
would always put up a tree and have a party near Christmas.
He
knew that Shota might not understand why he had to do this for Taru. But the
little boy needed something to make him feel good.
"Look
what I found." Subaru brought the boxes into the living room.
"Your
Christmas things!" Taru said happily.
"Let's
put them up." Subaru decided.
"We
need Christmas music!" Taru told him.
"Of
course! That’s what I was forgetting!" Subaru went to the stereo and found
a radio station playing Christmas music.
Subaru
opened the first box and took out the medium sized artificial tree. He put it
on the living room table.
"Uncle
Baru, that's not where the tree goes!" The boy told him.
"Where
does it go then?" Subaru asked.
His
son looked around the room. Then pointed to a small end table that was in a
corner. "We can put it on that. Then we can put the presents around
them."
"All
right, let's do that." Subaru decided.
Subaru
put the tree on the end table. He could hear Taru going through the boxes. With
every box that was open, Taru looked more and more heartbroken.
"What's
wrong?" Subaru asked.
"You
don't have an angel, for the top of the tree." Taru looked as if he was
about to cry. "We can't have Christmas without the angel."
"Let
me think a minute." Subaru closed his eyes. He could remember Shota had a
special box that was in his drawer in the bedroom. "I'll be right back
Taru-chan."
Subaru
went back into the bedroom. He quickly opened the drawer and took the box out.
It was labeled angel. He knew that Shota had some strange beliefs about the
angel ornament. He had told Subaru that whoever put it on the top of the tree
got a wish granted.
Subaru
found Taru crying to himself. Subaru knew it must be hard on the child, now
that he was totally alone.
"Look
Taru-Chan, I've found the angel." Subaru told him.
"You
found the angel?" Taru quickly wiped his eyes. "You'll get the
wish?"
"I
don't need a wish," Subaru opened the box. "You're a big boy. I think
you need a wish."
"But
I have to put in on top. I'm too short." Taru pointed out.
"I'll
lift you up." Subaru handed the angel to Taru. Then he picked the boy up
in his arms.
Taru
placed the angel at the top of the tree. Then he closed his eyes tightly.
"Please, please give me my wish. Please let my papa find me so I'm no
longer alone. "
Subaru
found himself repeating Taru's words. Tears rolled down his cheeks. He hoped
that he would be able to tell Taru that his wish came true.
***************************
As
Shota’s partner Subaru knew he had to support his lover in a hard time. The way
that he did was to take care of Taru while Shota was on bereavement leave. It
was hard, Subaru really wanted to be with Shota. But he knew in the long run
that it would be for the best if he stayed away from the funeral.
It
had been a week since Kaori died. Shota was scheduled to return to Osaka from
his family home in Hyogo the next day. Shota had requested that Subaru not pick
him up at the airport. Shota was afraid that the press would film them.
Subaru
busied himself getting their apartment ready. He wanted it to look perfect when
his lover arrived.
He
worked on the shrine. Shota had a small one in the corner of the living room.
Subaru didn’t' really care about the shrine, he wasn't too religious. But it
had always given Shota comfort. He placed a framed copy of Shota's favorite
photo of Kaori on the shrine.
Subaru
looked at his son. Taru was sitting at the living room table coloring a
picture.
"What
are you drawing?" Subaru sat by him.
"Just
a picture." Taru told him.
Subaru
looked at the drawing. Like many kids Taru drew a picture of a house. But there
was only a child in front of the house.
"Where's
everyone else?" Subaru asked.
"I
only have me." Taru told him. 'Now that Mama's gone, I'm all alone."
Alone,
Subaru could remember the time he was apart from Shota. He had been alone then.
It had been hard on him. But he could imagine just how hard it could be for a
small child.
"You're
not alone," Subaru told him. "You have your Uncle Shota and me. We'll
be your family."
"All
the kids at school laugh at me because I have no Papa." Taru said glumly.
"Now I have no Mama."
"Taru
Chan, you do have a Papa." Subaru reached out, smoothing the hair from his
face.
"Mama
said Papa don't want me." The boy said sadly. "He wouldn't visit
Taru. Mama said I look like my Papa. If I do, why won't he want me?"
"You
Papa didn't know about you." Subaru tried to explain. "If he had, he
would have been there for you."
"Why
would he not know that I was alive?" Taru sounded confused.
"I
knew that you were alive, but your Mama didn't tell me that I was your
Papa." Subaru confessed.
Taru’s
eyes got huge. "You're my papa?"
"I'm
sorry I wasn't there for you." Subaru fought back the tears. "But I
promise that you're never be alone. Your papa will protect you."
"I
always feel safe with you, Papa." the boy took Subaru's hand.
"I
never thought I would ever hear you call me Papa." the tears he had been
holding in began to fall.
"Don't
cry Papa, it's all right." Taru put his arms around him. "Taru's here
for you. You don't need to cry."
"It’s
just that I love you so much." Subaru admitted.
"I
love you too Papa." the boy hugged him tighter.
**************
Shota
came back from family's house in Hyogo. He was upset to see the apartment had
all ready been decorated for Christmas. Subaru hadn't even put everything in
the correct place. Plus it was his job to decorate for Christmas. Subaru didn't
even celebrate the holiday.
Shota
was also upset to see the angel had been put on the tree, which meant that
Subaru had been digging around in his things again. Shota knew that Subaru had
no idea about the tradition of the angel wish. He was angry that the wish had
been wasted.
Shota
couldn't help but notice the drawings that had been placed on the wall. One of
a house and a little boy. The other of the same boy, but two men were with him,
along with five dogs.
Taru
came into the room from the kitchen. He was wearing a blue apron. "Uncle
Shota, you're home."
"What
are you doing Taru?" Shota asked.
"We're
cooking!" Taru told him. "We just took the Christmas cookies out of
the oven."
"Can
I have one when their cool?"
"Of
course Uncle Shota!" Taru went to the pictures. "Look at my
drawings."
Shota
looked at them again. "Can you describe them for me?"
"The
first one I drew when I thought I was alone." Taru explained. "Then
Papa told me that you and he are my family, so I will never be alone
again."
"Papa?"
Shota repeated.
"I'm
sorry, it’s supposed to be a secret." he looked away from him ashamed.
"Papa wanted to tell you himself. It’s such a big secret, that Taru told
it."
"When
did he tell you?" Shota demanded.
"Yesterday."
Taru said. "The angel granted me my wish. I finally have a Papa."
"The
angel?"
"Papa
let me put the angel on the top of the tree. Then I wished really hard that I
could find my Papa." Taru explained.
"You
made the angel wish?" Shota asked.
"My
angel wish came true Uncle Shota. I found my Papa." Taru said excited.
"Who's
at the door?" Subaru came into the living room.
"It's
Uncle Shota, Papa." Taru told him.
"I
see you told him." Shota said.
"I
know I'm not respecting your sister’s wishes," Subaru told him. "I
was alone for two years. I didn't want him to be alone. Taru needs his
Papa."
"We
need to talk," Shota decided. He glanced at Taru. "Alone."
********************
They
went to their bedroom and shut the door. Shota had to talk to Subaru, to get
him to understand just how wrong Subaru was to tell Taru the truth. The problem
was; Shota was too angry to think straight.
"Why
did you tell Taru that you were his father?" Shota demanded.
"I
thought Taru had the right to know the truth." Subaru told him.
"That
really wasn't your responsibility to decide." Shota told him. "When I
left the letter for you, I wanted you to abide by Kaori's decision."
"Why
didn't you tell me that I am Taru’s father?" Subaru demanded.
"It
was Kaori's choice. She made me promise not to tell you." He tried to
explain.
"Why
are you telling me this now?"
"My
mother can't take care of Taru." Shota tried to explain. "She knows
you're Taru’s father. She thinks it would be best if he live with us."
"This
is a lot to take in." Subaru paused. "You mother wants Taru to live
with me, but to keep the truth from him?"
"It’s
what Kaori wants," Shota pointed out. "We have to respect my sister's
wishes."
"Tell
me Shota, what do you want?" Subaru demanded. "I feel like you've
made a choice about us, and you're afraid to tell me."
"I
thought I could trust you with the truth."
"The
truth is my son was alone." Subaru tried hard to control his temper.
"The truth is if I hadn't told him that I was his father, he would still
be alone. Now he has a family."
"Taru
all ready had a family, my mother and me." Shota countered.
"You're
not Taru's father! I am!" Subaru screamed. "Your sister kept the
truth from us to punish me! Without me, Taru's alone!"
"I've
all ready told you, Taru's not alone!" Shota couldn't keep the anger out
of his voice. "Kaori decided that he doesn't need you!"
"I'm
his father!" Subaru thundered.
"I'm
the one that is going to have control of Taru, not you." Shota confessed.
"You can live with us, but you have no legal right over Taru."
"Is
that what your mother decided?" Subaru asked sarcastically.
"She
wants the best for Taru." Shota told him. "Taru doesn't have your
name. He will never legally be a part of your family."
"I'm
leaving." Subaru decided. "I'm taking my son with me. No matter what
you assholes decide, I'm his father."
“Subaru…” Shota began.
Subaru
went into the living room. He grabbed the dog’s leashes. He quickly put them on
the dogs.
“Papa,
are you taking the dogs for a walk?” Taru asked.
“We
need to visit Uncle Hina,” Subaru told him. “Put your coat on.”
“Yes
Papa.” Taru did as he was told, he put his coat on.
Subaru
handed his son Java and Siva’s leashes. He looked back to Shota, his face full
of pain. He stood for a moment, as if he was waiting for something.
"Subaru..."
Shota began.
"No
words Shota. We both knew it would end this way." Subaru's voice cracked.
"I hope someday we'll be friends."
"We're
more than friends." Shota reminded him. "We're engaged."
"No,
we’re not engaged anymore." A single tear rolled down Subaru's cheek.
"I really wanted to spend my life with you. But you couldn't trust me with
the truth."
“Papa,
are we going?” Taru asked.
“Yes,
we’re leaving.” Subaru looked at Shota, his eyes full of tears. “Sayonara
Yasuda-kun.”
With
that, Subaru walked out of Yasuda Shota’s life.
Shota
looked around the apartment, everything that he been angry about he saw in a
different light. He shouldn’t have gotten upset about Subaru decorating the
apartment for Christmas. He realized that Subaru had tried hard to make Shota’s
homecoming a happy one.
Shota
also knew that he was very wrong in condemning Subaru for telling Taru the
truth. Subaru really loved Taru. He only wanted the best for him.
Shota
ran to the door, he opened it and looked down the hallway. Subaru and Taru were
gone, almost as if they had never been there in the first place.
"I'll
get you back," Shota promised himself. "Somehow we'll spend Christmas
together."
*********************
Subaru
felt liked he was running away from home. He brought with him the couple's five
dogs and Taru. He had no clothes or anything. He just knew he had to get away
from Shota. His heart hurt so much. The pain was worse then what he felt from
his broken nose and his broken orbital bone. Subaru felt even worse than the
day he hit rock bottom. It was the agony of the end of a dream.
Subaru
went to Hina's apartment. He had promised his sponsor that he would stop
visiting without calling first, since Hina was now Ryo's sponsor. But this was
different. If he didn't talk to his sponsor, he knew he would go back to
drinking. He knew it would be so easy. If he got drunk he knew he would forget
about Shota, at least for a little while.
Ohkura
opened the door. He was wearing a robe. "Let me guess, you're craving beer
again."
"Can
we come in?" Subaru asked.
"Even
if I said no, you'd barge in anyway." Ohkura gave him a half smile.
"Why are you here?"
"I
had a fight with Shota. We're over." Subaru told him. "I left and I'm
never, ever going back."
"There's
more isn't there?" The drummer guessed.
"I
have to stop myself from getting drunk." Subaru admitted.
"Come
in," Ohkura moved so they could come into the apartment.
"Papa,
are we in trouble?" Taru asked.
"No
honey, you're not in trouble." Subaru told him. "Why don't you play
with the dogs?"
Taru
unleashed his dogs and ran into the living room with them .He got on the floor
and began playing with them.
"Do
you want me to talk to Shota for you?" Ohkura offered.
"What
will that help? I lost him Tacchon." Subaru felt very depressed. "I
just wish he could have understood my feelings."
"Leave
it to me." Ohkura promised. "Shingo, I'm running to Shota's apartment.
I'll be back soon."
Subaru
watched Ohkura leave. He began to pace the small entry area. If he got drunk he
wouldn't remember. The pain would be gone. But now he had Taru. His son's
presence reminded him of his past, when he was only seven. Subaru's father had
chosen the bottle over his family.
"You
made me a promise Subaru," Hina told him.
Subaru
walked into the living room. "I know, I know, but this is the first time
in a very long time that I want to get so drunk that I forget everything."
"So
why come here?"
"Because
I know I can't get drunk!" Subaru said almost exasperated. "I need, I
really need to talk to someone. I can't, I can't drink. I have to think of
Taru-chan."
"It’s
all right. Remember I told you that I'll always be here for you." Hina
gestured to the couch and Subaru sat down. "What happened?"
"I
left Shota." Subaru confessed. "I thought when he came home that he
would be happy to see us. Instead he blew up at me."
"So
you want to get drunk because Shota got angry?" Hina guessed.
"No,
it's because of something else. Something really big." Subaru thought for
a second. "I didn't follow Shota's wishes. Not only that, he didn't trust
me with the truth."
"What
kind of truth is that?" Hina prompted.
"Shota
left me a letter that told me that I'm Taru's father." Subaru admitted.
"I don't even remember sleeping with Kaori. But I was told I did when I
was very drunk."
"All
alcoholics do things they don't remember. Things that make you ashamed of
afterwards."
"I
look at Taru, and I see myself." Subaru confessed. "If I start
drinking, I'll become like my father."
"No,
you're not like your father." Hina reached out, rubbing Subaru's back.
"You came for help. Your father never did, and that's what killed
him."
"I
just wish Shota and I hadn't had the fight."
"Shota
probably didn't mean whatever he told you." Hina said gently. "He's
still going through grief for his sister."
"Kaori
wished that I never find out that Taru's my son. Taru was so alone. He needed
his Papa, so I told him the truth. ." Subaru felt tears sting his eyes.
"Now Shota's mad at me because I didn’t' follow Kaori's wishes."
"Taru
needs you," Hina reminded him.
"Shota's
family has decided that Shota will be Taru's guardian." Subaru looked at
Hina. "I feel like Shota's picked his family over me. I thought our
relationship meant more to him than that. I had even proposed to him."
"You
want to marry him?"
"Yeah,
I do. But how can I marry anyone who doesn't trust me?" Subaru said
hopeless. "I really wish I could take everything back, but I know it's too
late."
"That
hurts doesn't it?"
"The
only thing I've wanted with Shota is to have a family." Subaru felt the
tears sting his eyes. "Now I have the child I so desperately want, and I
no longer have Shota."
"But
you do have a family." Hina pointed out. "You have Taru. The two of
you can be a family."
"What's
going to happen when Johnny-sama finds out about my son?" a tear escaped
from his eyes and rolled down his cheek. "He'll make me give Taru
up."
"Don't
worry about Johnny-sama. I'll take care of him." Hina promised.
"Right now you have a family to worry about."
*******************
There
was a knock at the apartment door. Shota felt an adrenalin rush. Had Subaru
returned home? He quickly ran to the door and opened it. Instead of Subaru, he
found Ohkura, wearing only a bath robe.
“What
are you doing here?” Shota asked ushering his friend inside.
“Subaru
is really, really upset. He came to our apartment needing a lot of help.” The
drummer explained. “He told me that for the first time in a long time, he
wanted to get so drunk he would forget everything.”
“We
had a fight,”
“I
guessed that.” Ohkura sat down on the couch.
"I
left him a letter telling him that he's Taru's father." Shota admitted as
he sat down by his friend. "I told him that he wasn't supposed to tell
Taru the truth, but he did."
"Keeping
the truth from Taru would upset Subaru." Ohkura admitted. "He's
always wanted to be a father. Now he finds out he's one, and he has to keep the
fact a secret.”
"I
feel so torn." Shota admitted. "I want to have a celebration, that
we're finally a family. But I have to go by my sister's wishes."
"You
should do what your heart tells you to." Ohkura said after a few moments
of thought.
"My
heart tells me to go to Subaru, to beg him to come back to me." Shota said
without thinking.
"Then
why not do that?"
"What
if he tells me to go away and never come back?" Shota countered.
"Do
you really think Subaru will do that?" Ohkura gave him a knowing smile.
"You're his world. Give it a chance Yassan."
“Give
me a few minutes to regroup.” Shota decided. “Is there any way you can get Hina
out of his apartment?”
“Don’t
worry; I’ll take care of it.” His friend promised.
******************
Shota
had never been so afraid in his life. He had preformed solos in front of an
audience at the Tokyo dome, and he wasn't so scared. He wasn't even this scared
around Johnny-sama.
Finally,
he knocked on Ohkura's door.
"Coming,"
the very familiar voice of his lover said. A few minutes later the door opened.
"Sho-chan, what are you doing here?"
"We
have to talk." Shota told him. 'Please let me in."
"Sure,
come in." Subaru moved to let Shota come into the apartment.
"Where's
Taru?" Shota asked looking around the apartment.
"Hina
and Ohkura took him to the park." Subaru explained. "Now what do you
want to talk about?"
"I
wanted you to know that you were right. Taru has a right to know who his father
is." He paused. "I've felt so torn. I tried to go by my sister's
wishes. But I wanted you to have the family you always wanted."
"Why
didn't you ever tell me?"
"Because
I would have lost Kaori and Taru. I kept trying to talk her into telling you. I
thought you had a right to know." A tear rolled down his cheek. "You
don't know how truly sorry I am. I never wanted to hurt you."
“Grief
does strange things to people,” Subaru reminded him.
The
tears came, Shota knew he was showing weakness, but they wouldn't stop.
"I
want us to be a family. I want us to spend Christmas together." Shota
wiped the tears from his face. "I wish I hadn't lost my temper when I
returned to our wonderful home. But now there's nothing. Why does loosing you
have to hurt so much?"
Shota
felt arms going around him, very familiar arms. Then a tear choked voice said.
"Don’t' cry Shota Chan, please don't cry."
"I
lost you. I can't live without you." the tears turned to sobs.
"No,
no, you didn't lose me." Subaru soothed. "I was wrong to lose my
temper. I should have thought that you were going through grief. If I had to do
it over again, I would have been more understanding. I'm sorry Sho-Chan."
'You
left me."
"I
was wrong to leave you." His lover stroked his hair. "I messed up our
dream, didn't I?"
"Come
back to me, please." Shota begged. "We can have the family you always
dreamed of, you, me and Taru."
"A
family, I'd like that." Subaru kissed his lover very gently.
Shota
pulled away from Subaru, he reached out touching his face. His lover still wore
the patch that covered his broken orbital bone. “Let’s go home.”
“What
about our dogs and Taru?” Subaru asked.
“We’ll
leave Tacchon and Hina a note,” Shota found himself smiling. “They insist
Taru’s their nephew, so why don’t we ask them to baby sit?”
“Sounds
good to me.” Subaru gave Shota his special smile. Then Subaru kissed Shota one
more time.
***********************
*******************
Three
days before Christmas, Subaru was able to get his eye patch off. He began to
look normal again. He had come and went from Taru's school, never once being
recognized. Now there were looks, not the looks of pity that he had been given
when he wore the eye patch and the nose brace, these were looks of recognition.
Subaru
wasn't sure he liked the looks. He had enjoyed being known as "Taru's
uncle/Papa." Now he was back to being a celebrity.
It
was the night of Taru's school program. Shota, Subaru and several other parents
were in a classroom with their children who were getting ready for the program.
The program was different then what Subaru had always participated when he went
to school. Instead of being in the classroom, the program was being held in the
auditorium, with all of the students participating.
Shota
fussed around Taru. Helping him get his angel costume ready. Subaru wasn't sure
why his son was dressed as an angel. He just knew that all the children in the
classroom were wearing some type of costume.
"Why
are you so nervous?" Shota asked him.
"I've
never been to my son's school program before." Subaru confessed.
"It’s
just a school program," Shota told him. "You don't have to do
anything, just watch."
"Don't
worry Papa, I'll do my best." Taru tried to reassure him.
"I
know, you'll be fine." Subaru smiled at his son.
"Parents,
it's time for you to go sit in the audience." A teacher told them.
Subaru
looked his son over one more time. "Try hard."
"I
will," Taru promised.
"Come
on Papa," Shota took Subaru's hand.
********
Subaru
followed Shota to the auditorium. For the first time, he realized that there
were teen aged girls in the audience. A couple squealed when they saw them.
Some whispered to each other. Several mothers took a camera out and took photos
of them.
Subaru
tried to ignore the audience. He wasn't here for the attention; he was there
for his son. But the camera's bothered him. The agency had a no photograph rule
and Subaru knew he would be in a lot of trouble if any of the pictures were
sold to the press.
"Hina
and Tacchon saved us a seat." Shota whispered to him. "See? Their
sitting right by Ryo, Maru and Kimi."
Subaru
groaned to himself. *Great, just what I need. The whole group here!*
Shota
grabbed Subaru's hand. "Come on, their waiting for us."
More
camera clicks. Subaru hated cameras' he really did. He should have said
something, but he didn't. Instead he followed Shota to the seat and sat down.
"What's
wrong?" Hina whispered.
"Nothing,"
Subaru grumbled as he ignored more people taking his photo.
"Quit
acting like me on a bad day," Ryo told him.
"Shut
up Ryo." Subaru snapped.
"You're
here to watch your son perform." Yoko said way too loudly.
Those
made a good part of the audience turn around and look at them. Subaru tried to
duck down in his seat. He wanted to hide away.
The
program finally began. That took the audience's attention off of the group.
Subaru
finds that the program was cute. They didn't shove the church thing down his
throat. He hated that when he had gone to church before. Instead it was about
the children.
Taru
sang his solo. He was dressed as an angel. His voice was strong, clear. It
didn't take Subaru two seconds to decide that his son would never join Johnny's.
********************
One
of the things Shota loved about his apartment was the fact that two of the
walls had windows to the outside. While everyone else he knew complained about
living in an apartment that was on a corner of the building, Shota adored it.
Shota
could hear a thunderstorm going on outside. Shota loved sleeping in the rain.
But he knew that both Subaru and Taru hated bad storms.
Shota
was woken by a small body jumping on the bed. Thinking it was one of the dogs;
he turned over and began to pet it.
"Uncle
Shota, I'm not a dog." Taru told him.
"What's
wrong Taru?" Subaru sounded very, very afraid.
"There's
thunder!" Taru almost yelled. "Can I sleep in here tonight?"
"Shota-Chan,
can he stay tonight?" Subaru asked.
"Of
course," Shota turned so he was lying on his side.
"What
about papa? Can he stay?" Taru put on his best pout.
There
was a loud crash of thunder. Taru grabbed onto Subaru as tightly as he could.
"Don't
make me leave him." Subaru pleaded. "I need to protect him."
"All
right, this time." There was another peel of thunder. Shota moved closer
to the, and hugged the two of them tightly.
***********************************
Shota
was the first one up the next morning. It was only three thirty, but Shota was
going to start co hosting a morning show right after New Years, and all the
start times were at six. So he was getting ready for his new show. He began to
make a pot of coffee. Someone pounded on the front door.
Shota
ran and answered it. It was Yoko, who pushed his way inside. He was carrying a
stack of newspapers.
"What
are you doing here at this time of morning?" Shota asked.
"We've
got a problem, a really big problem." Yoko sounded like he was out of
breath. "You better wake up Subaru."
"It's
that big?" Shota asked.
"The
rest will be arriving here soon." Yoko told him. "I've called an
emergency group meeting."
"But
why here?"
"Because
we have to figure out what to say before Johnny-sama gets wind of this."
Yoko tried to explain. "And he will, as soon as he picks up a paper."
"I'll
go wake up Subaru." Shota decided.
Shota
went into their bedroom. Very carefully he shook Subaru awake, explaining that
Yoko had called an emergency group meeting.
Shota
went back into the bedroom. He was followed by a very tired looking Subaru.
Within
twenty minutes the whole group was sitting in the living room. None of them
looked too happy.
"It's
Christmas eve Kimi." Hina reminded him. "It's a day of romance, not
group meetings."
"I'm
supposed to be at the studio in two hours." Maru reminded him.
"Yeah,
why do we have to have a group meeting at four in the morning?" Ryo
grumbled.
"We're
lucky my cousin is a news agent. He called me as soon as he got the morning
papers." Yoko said.
"What’s
so important about the papers?" Ohkura asked.
Yoko
held up a paper. There was a photo of the group at the school program. The
headline was; "Kanjani 8 attend school program to see Yasuda Shota's
bastard son perform."
"That's
just plain crazy." Ryo said. "Shota's never even slept with a
girl."
"It
gets worse." Yoko showed them headline after headline. One asking why
Shota's son looked like Shibutani. One paper commented on Shota holding
Subaru's hand.
"Hina,
you told me you would talk to Johnny-sama about Taru." Subaru said.
"I
did, and he was fine with being a father as long as you were quiet about
it." Hina explained. "But now that it's gotten out in public."
"I'm
in big trouble."
"It's
all of us," Yoko pointed out.
"What
if I go to Johnny-sama and take responsibility for you guys going to the
program?" Subaru suggested.
"But
it wasn't you." Maru said. "Taru is the one that invited us."
"I'm
Taru's father. I have to protect him."
"Babu-Chan,
you could get fired." Shota said softly.
"I
know, but I enjoyed these few weeks of being off." Subaru told him.
"I've worked before to support myself. I'll just work a little harder to
support our family."
Just
then Shota's cell phone began to ring. He picked it up off the table.
"It's Johnny-sama's private number."
Subaru
grabbed the phone. "I'll talk to him."
Subaru
went to the kitchen, shutting the door.
"I
can't believe he did that," Maru said.
"It's
like an alien took over Subaru and suddenly there's a responsible man in his
place." Ryo said.
"He's
been this way since he found out that he is Taru's father." Shota told
him.
****************************
Thirty
minutes later, Subaru came back into the living room. He handed Shota his cell
phone.
"What
happened?" Shota asked. "Did he fire you?"
"Of
course he didn't fire me." Subaru sounded really upset. "He just came
up with something that apparently he convinced your mother to accept."
"What's
that?"
"The
agency has released a press release stating that I was secretly married to
Kaori. Taru was our child. I will raise our son as a widower. Shota of course
would be involved in raising our son as Taru's uncle. "
"My
mother agreed to that?" Shota asked.
“Johnny-sama
told me she did.”
"That
isn't all is it?" Ryo guessed.
"What
did Johnny-sama want?" Yoko asked.
“He’s
going to let me keep Taru," Subaru sank down on the couch, putting his
head in his hands. His shoulders began to shake. Subaru was crying in front of
everyone.
"He's
punished you." Shota realized.
"My
salary is being cut by two thirds. Not only that, Johnny-sama's putting my
savings in trust. I won’t' be able to touch it until I'm forty." Subaru
felt hopeless. "How am I going to be able to support Taru?"
"You
mean, how are we going to support Taru." Shota sat down beside him.
"Are
you sure you want to stay with me?"
"We're
a family now. You, me and Taru." Shota ran his hand across Subaru's back.
"You
shouldn't have to support me."
"I
know, but I don't mind. We're family after all."' Shota hugged him. “The
three of us together are a family.”
"You
baka's forget, we're not just a group, we're a part of your family too."
Ryo growled.
"Between
the rest of us, we'll be able to support you and Taru." Maru decided.
Shota
was surprised when the rest of the group surrounded them, enveloping them in a
group hug. But then he realized he shouldn't be. They were after all, family.
*****************
Subaru
decided that Christmas wasn't his favorite holiday. For one thing he had to buy
seven presents for Taru, and then wait till his son was sleeping to wrap them.
That meant that Subaru was up to all hours putting together the art desk that
he had bought for his son. He had spent two hours putting that desk together.
Now all the exhausted Subaru wanted to do was sleep. But unfortunately, the
fates had decided that on this day, Subaru wouldn't get to sleep.
"Papa!
Papa! Wake up!" an excited voice said to Subaru. "You got to wake up,
come see!"
Subaru
opened his eyes. He looked at his son. "Taru-Chan, it's still early."
"Papa!
Santa came! You've got to wake up." Taru insisted.
"Why
is he waking up so early?" Subaru groaned to himself.
"Get
used to it Papa," An all ready awake Shota smiled at him. 'This is what's
going to happen every Christmas."
"But
I was up till four wrapping..."
Shota
put his hand on Subaru's mouth. "Get up and put your robe on."
Subaru
grumbled, but did as he was told. He followed his excited son to the living
room. The presents were in the same place that Subaru had placed them less than
an hour before. Subaru sat down on the couch.
"Why
did the world do this to me? Why do people have to wake up so early on
Christmas morning?" Subaru asked himself. He wanted to close his eyes and
drift back to sleep.
Shota
sat down beside him and poked him hard in the side. "I mean it Babu, get
up and stay up. Stop being so grumpy."
"All
right," Subaru stretched, he suddenly felt more awake.
"How
many presents did you get?" Shota asked Taru.
Taru
counted. "Nine! Santa only brings me same presents as my age. I’m only
seven! Why did I get so many?"
"Maybe
Santa lost count." Shota said. "Why don't you check the tags?"
"Taru,
Taru, Taru," The child held up a present. "This one says Uncle
Shota!"
"Why
did Santa bring me a present?" Shota asked confused.
"You
must have been extra good!" The child handed him the present. Then went
through the rest. "There's a present for Papa!"
Taru
gave the small box to Subaru. Then he went back to his pile of presents and
began to open them. The dogs got involved in playing with the paper, Taru put a
bow on each one's collar.
Subaru
didn't realize he could have so much fun just watching a small child shriek
with delight in getting a new set of art supplies. Then he jumped for joy when
he took the wrappings off his new art desk.
"Papa!
Papa! Santa gave me everything I wanted!" The child told him.
"Well,
you have been good." Subaru pointed out.
"Aren’t'
you two going to open your gifts?" Taru asked.
"Of
course," Shota opened his box. Inside was a wedding band. He brought his
hand to his lips. "Subaru."
"I
know we can't be legally married, but can't we please be privately
married?" Subaru asked.
"That's
all I want," Shota suddenly looked close to tears. "Please Babu, put
it on me."
Subaru
took the ring out of the box. Shota held out his shaking hand. As he slid the
ring on Shota's finger he said. "From this day forwards, we're married in
our hearts."
"If
you get married, you're supposed to kiss." Taru pointed out.
Subaru
reached out and touched Shota's cheek, and then he kissed him gently.
"I'm
so happy," Shota told him. "Now my husband, you have to open your
gift."
"It
can wait." Subaru was so happy that his present didn't matter. The only
thing that mattered was the smile on his lover's face.
"Our
marriage can be even more special if you open it." Shota insisted.
"All
right," Subaru opened the gift. Inside was a gold wedding band.
"Shota, how did you know what I was planning?"
"I
didn't. I was going to try and talk you into getting married today."
Subaru
handed the box to Shota. "Put it on me."
Subaru
held his left hand out, and Shota slid the ring on it. "I love you so
much. Take this ring as a sign of our commitment, my husband."
***************
Subaru
had been almost constant contact with his mother about Taru. She had been in
America with Subaru's brother, helping him settle at the university that he
would be attending starting in January. She was so excited to have a grandson.
She arranged to fly back to Japan in time for the New Year’s holiday. The only
thing she wanted to do was to meet Taru.
The
doorbell rang. Subaru went and answered it. It was Subaru's mother, Shibutani
San. Subaru smiled at his mother. "I didn't think you were getting back
from America until tomorrow."
"I
got an earlier flight," She told him as she walked into the apartment.
"Now where is my grandson?"
"I
think he's playing with his gifts." Subaru told her.
"Gifts?
It isn't New Years." She said confused.
"The
Yasuda's are Catholic." Subaru tried to explain. "Shota's family has
always celebrated Christmas in the Western way."
The
door to the kitchen opened. Shota came out.
"Shota
kun! It's good to see you again." Subaru's mother smiled, she went to him
and kissed him on the cheek.
"It's
good to see you too Shibutani San." Shota told her.
"I
keep telling you, call me Rae. We are family." She chided. "Subaru
told me that you were going to get married today."
"You
don't mind that we're privately married?" Shota sounded like he couldn't
believe his ears. "My mother wasn't please when I told her we got
married."
"I'm
so happy that you’re now my son." Subaru's mother smiled at him. "Now
please, call me Rae."
"Yes, of course, Rae." Shota corrected himself.
"I'll
go get Taru." Subaru told them.
Subaru
went to his son's room. Taru was busy at his new desk and drawing with his new
art supplies.
"Taru
there is someone I want you to meet." Subaru said.
"Really?
Who?" the boy asked curiously.
"My
mother wants to meet you." he told him. "She came all the way from
America to meet you."
"Okay,"
he put his things down and followed Subaru into the living room.
"Mama,
this is my son Taru." Subaru introduced.
"Your
son looks just like you did when you were a boy." Shibutani San knelt down
so she was at Taru's level. "It's good to meet you Taru. I'm your
grandmother."
"I
have another grandmother?" Taru asked.
"You
don't mind do you?" She smiled.
"Santa
brought me another present." Taru realized. "He brought me a
grandma!"
********************
There
was a knock at the door. Shota ran and answered it. He found Maru and Ryo
standing there.
"I'm
sorry I'm late," Maru said as he came into the apartment. "I had to
work."
"What
are you late for?" Shota asked confused.
"Nothing,
it's nothing," Ryo came behind him, wearing dark glasses and carrying a
large bag in one hand, a pie in the other. "Isn't that right Ryuhei? It's
nothing."
"You
guys have something planned." Shota realized.
"Why
would we have anything planned?" Ryo pretended ignorance. "I'll put
the pie in the kitchen."
Just
then there was another knock. When Shota answered, it was Yoko who also carried
bags.
"What
are you doing here?" Shota asked.
"Kimi-kun,
just on time!" Shibutani San went up to him, she directed him into the
kitchen.
Five
minutes later, Hina and Ohkura arrived. They too carried bags. They too were
hustled into the kitchen.
"Something
really weird is going on." Shota said to the only other two left in the
room, Subaru and Taru.
"You
think?" Subaru countered.
"Do
you have any idea why the rest of the group hiding in the kitchen with your
mother?"
"Not
a clue." Subaru admitted. "But I had a feeling my mother was up to
something when she suddenly came home early."
**************
About
thirty minutes after they arrived, Maru and Ryo came out of the kitchen. They
put wrapped presents by the tree.
"Why
are you putting presents out?" Taru asked.
"Santa
left some of your presents at our place." Maru lied.
"So
we thought we'd give him a hand and deliver them to you." Ryo said with a
smile.
"What's
going on?" Subaru asked.
"You'll
find out." Ryo said before he grabbed his lover and went back into the
kitchen.
A
few moments passed and Subaru got his answer. The rest of the group came into
the dining room. They placed platters of food on the dining room table.
"We
had a group meeting." Hina said.
"I
was there remember?" Subaru asked.
Hina
wacked Subaru on the head. "We had last night. We decided since we have to
work on New Years, we'll celebrate our family gathering today."
"Family
gathering?" Subaru repeated.
"Taru
has a very large family," Ohkura told him as he put the plates out.
"It's natural that they would spend it together."
"I
have eight uncles Papa, one uncle's in America. Uncle Uchi's in Tokyo and the
rest are here with us!" Taru told him. "We are a family now aren't
we?"
"Of
course we are." Subaru couldn't help but smile at his son.
"It’s
time to eat," Shibutani San came out of the kitchen.
"Come
on Subaru, be human for once." Hina whispered to him. "We didn't want
Taru to be alone on his first Christmas without his mother."
Come
on Papa, let's sit down." Taru said tugging his hand.
Subaru
decided to give in gracefully. Taru and Shota looked so happy as they sat down.
"Did
Santa bring you anything good?" Maru asked Taru.
"Santa
brought Uncle Shota and Papa rings." Taru told the group. "They got
married."
"Married?
Really?" Ohkura asked with interest. "You really got married?"
Shota
showed Ohkura his ring. "Yeah, we're privately married."
"Shingo-Chan,"
Ohkura looked at his lover. "I want to get married."
"We'll
talk about that later." Hina told him. "We're here to have a
celebration, not get engaged."
"But
I want to get engaged!" The drummer pouted. "Not tomorrow, not next
week but now!"
"All
right, we're engaged." Hina groaned. "Now can we please eat?"
Ohkura
grin lit up the room. He got up and kissed Hina on the cheek. Then he sat back
down.
"If
you tell them I gave you a ring last night, you're in big trouble." Ryo
told Maru.
"I
won’t' tell them we got engaged." Maru said perkily.
"Come
on everyone, the food's getting cold." Shibutani San told them.
"Let's eat."
Subaru
looked at the rest of the group. At time he hated them, at times he loved them.
Even though they had told him that they were family this was the first time
that Subaru really felt that Kanjani 8 were really a family. He realized he
finally had what he had always wished for. A family that loved him as much as
he cared for them.